Tuesday is a day without an identity. It's not reviled like Monday, gleefully anticipated like Friday, or celebrated like Saturday. It doesn't have a cool name like Wednesday's "humpday," or Sunday's spiritual identity. Let's help Tuesday find itself. Lately, I've been having fun with Blogger's random question feature. So, every Tuesday, I'll take a new question, post my answer here, and ask for yours in the comments. Come on. Tuesday needs you.
Whoops! Your tongue is now a magnet. Whatever will you use for silverware?
I'll never eat. I'll be too busy writhing on the floor in pain after my tongue rips the fillings out of my teeth.
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It Is We Who Must Be Bent
7 hours ago
4 comments:
I'll just eat foods high in iron. That way I won't need silverware, the food will magically fly into my mouth all on its own! Brilliant!
First, build a cage around your mouth to protect random metal objects from entering uninvited. Second, throw all your food into a food processor, blend well, and slurp with a straw through the cage.
I'm thinking two options: go Asian all the way and only use bamboo chopsticks...or my personal favorite: The Taco Bell Spork!
I would choose a non-ferromagnetic substance such as copper. Over time copper would oxidize and become patina-ed. Then I would just tell people I stole a chunk of the Statue of Liberty. That would impress me.
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